Science

Does childhood trauma cause us to attract narcissistic people? understand relationships

Childhood is one of the most important stages in the life of any person, since in childhood a person largely determines what he will be like in adulthood. Therefore, traumas that occur in the first years of life give rise to disorders and unpleasant situations in adulthood. Some of these can lead to a person always seeking to associate with narcissistic people.

See also: 8 Tips for a Healthy Love Relationship

There is a wealth of existing research supporting a correlation between a history of childhood abuse and an increased risk of becoming involved in a toxic, narcissistic, or conflict relationship, experts say, according to Psychology Today.

Narcissistic parents normalize chaos for children

Children raised by narcissistic parents with abusive, disabled, or dismissive tendencies make the experience of chaos a normal part of life. This type of environment fails to teach the importance of self-respect or self-love, much less self-respect. Self-preservation as a means of survival is the only lesson learned from this kind of experience.

With a history of childhood abuse, a person has limited healthy experience to use as a guide in their future relationships. Children who grow up in such an environment do not learn what they are worth; they are taught to survive.

A common side effect of survival mode is an unconscious search for what is familiar because it is “comfortable”. The result is often a pattern of emotionally immature and psychologically limiting relationships that resonate with this “comfortable” pattern.

Warning signs to look out for

1 – Having narcissistic parents: children who grow up in a narcissistic environment learn one thing: chaos is “normal.” see how your friends live, and first understand that your home environment is not at all adapted for adaptation.

2 – Intermittent reinforcement is taught as “convenient”: Traumatic attachments start in our childhood, often as a result of a narcissistic upbringing where praise and attention are taught as contingent on excellence, performance, achievement, or achievement. The same caregivers show indifference or distrust when they see a child performing “below” their expectations.

3. Mirror behavior develops due to limited sense of self: when a disabling or abusive environment is taught as “normal”, the child will not know who they are. They may be shamed for expressing themselves, punished for their opinions, or shown to be indifferent to their likes or dislikes. This conditioning predisposes the child to look to others as a way to feel valued, belonging, and accepted.

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